One of my favorite songs is a song by India Aria entitled, “Video.” In this song India Arie sings about how she does not look like the idealized girls in popular music videos, but that she’s beautiful none-the-less. Contrary to the images of beauty that are often portrayed on television and in magazines, there is no such thing as the perfect kind of beauty because we are all beautiful in our own unique way. The key to being your most beautiful self is learning how to love yourself just the way you are so that the real you can shine through.
The most disturbing thing that a girl can do to herself is to pick herself apart because she doesn’t fit the media’s cookie-cutter image of beauty. The simple fact is the more you celebrate and accept the way yourself, the more beautiful you become. This really is true. Haven’t you met people who didn’t fit the conventional definition of beauty but something about them made them irresistibly attractive? So you see, it’s not about fitting an ideal, it’s about celebrating your uniqueness and celebrating the skin you’re in. When you carry yourself like the amazing girl that you are, you will radiate the kind of beauty that will make people stop and take notice of you.
Here are three things that you can do to love yourself just the way you are.
1. Be Confident. Projecting an attitude of confidence (not conceit) makes you more alluring and appealing. People will want to get to know you, because you’ll come off as a girl who’s comfortable in her own skin and who’s fun to be around. Even if you feel a bit nervous, do your best to project a positive and upbeat attitude. What will happen eventually is even if you feel a bit insecure at first on the inside, by making a conscious effort to think and act more positively and confidently, in time you will become more confident and positive.
2. Be Your Own Cheerleader. It’s great to have people in your life who lift you up and cheer you on. But, it’s also important to learn how to be your own best friend and to be your biggest cheerleader by pumping yourself up with so much encouragement and positive self-talk that you actually start to believe the best about yourself. How do you do this? By talking to yourself as if you were coaching a star athlete. If you were coaching a star athlete, you would not talk down to her nor would you focus on all of the negatives. You would motivate her to put her best foot forward and to stay positive. So instead of walking around with your head down feeling negative about yourself, be positive and cheer yourself on.
3. Get Physical. Girls who participate in some form of physical activity tend to feel more confident and in control than those who do not. So take up a sport, take a dance class or call a friend and go for regular morning walks. It’s not about losing weight or burning yourself out. It’s about getting your body moving so that you’ll have more energy and drive, not to mention you’ll probably meet new friends as well.
In closing the best way to love yourself just the way you are is to make up your mind to think and act more positively toward yourself. We all have insecurities and every girl in the world has something that she would like to change about herself, but instead of trying to measure up to an unrealistic image or obsess over what you believe to be your flaws, start embracing your uniqueness, make up your mind to love yourself through thick and thin and most of all… know that you were perfectly designed in love and light.
This article is an excerpt from the book, “Cool, Confident, and Strong: 52 Power Moves for Girls,” by Cassandra Mack.
Copyright © by Cassandra Mack.